Today You Are Two!


Happy birthday sweet boy!

We got you your own scooter and tied it up with a big shiny balloon; together I saw them stamp out every ounce of babyhood that was lingering behind.

You’ve changed so much these last few months. You talk so much more, maybe slightly less than other kids your age but we don’t care about that. Your pronunciation is rubbish which I LOVE. You say ‘buuubrees’ (blueberries) ‘bapple’ (apple) ‘bthuses’ (buses) ‘beebuts’ (buttons) and ‘duddles’ (cuddles) and these versions will stay around a lot longer than they might if I didn’t keep reinforcing them, especially the duddles, always the duddles.

At two you are a fractious, defiant little ball of energy but a loving one who is a total mummy’s boy. You’re a bruiser, you wade in pushing and shoving and stand up to your brother and laugh as he throws footballer fake falls. I can tell I’m going to have to keep tabs on you.

Playing with you is a daunting experience, one minute you are laughing and the next you are shaking with anger that the train you are pushing won’t fit through a much smaller tunnel. It’s too small lovely, it’s just too small. The laws of physics are a tough lesson to learn I know.

You like oranges, Fireman Sam, shoving people, Marmite toast, climbing, roundabouts, your trike, chucking your food all over the floor when you have finished, playing bundles with your brother, tipping water out of the bath, your threadbare stinky sheep comforter, techno, making dents in the wooden floor by lobbing stuff (stop this please!) and the sound of your daddy’s key in the lock.

I like when you shout ‘FART’ and giggle. I like that you think ‘SNATCH IT’ is the way you ask for something you want.

I like that you love to dance to Taylor Swift’s Shake It with me but then get annoyed when the next song comes on. It’s rubbish, I feel you.

I like the cute stuff you do like waving goodbye to one hand from the other saying ‘Bu-bye hands, see soon hands.’

This morning you woke up at 5.20am, were you just excited or did you know that I was up until 1? We planned to take you to soft play but then reasoned na – day off – sod it – pub! Sorry my darling but you know you’re loved ;)


Second home, he loves it really

The stuff you don’t like is growing by the day – being put in the buggy, mashed potato, having your hair washed, me picking your nose, when your Fireman Sam figures won’t sit up properly in the fire engine, getting messy hands, coming out of the bath, when people say ‘cake’ and there is no cake, wearing gloves and broken foodstuff.

You’re getting to be a handful and there’s no denying it, you drive me insane but don’t you worry i’m used to it. All the good bits, all the bad bits, all the laughs, the tears and all the tear your hair out bits – we still wouldn’t change a single thing about you.

Did you know that it’s entirely possible to find someone irritating as hell and still love the shit out of them regardless? (not literally).

Keep being you. You rock*.


*mostly rock


Post pub nap


P.S. My new book The Catastrophic Friendship Fails of Lottie Brooks is out on the 3rd March 2022! It's aimed at 9-12 year olds and you can buy it here :)


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19 thoughts on “Today You Are Two!

  1. Bex @ The Mummy Adventure

    I didn’t realise our little ones were so close in age! I will be writing this post in less than a week and lots of this sounds very familiar – whirlwind 2 year old with a love of oranges and farts. Happy Birthday to your little guy x

  2. Zoe

    My little girl is 3 today (not until 10.25pm, I’ve still got those hours!) and I’m a bit bowled over.
    She doesn’t stand still long enough for me to take her in, this new, bright, bustling, child, and I feel a bit like I want to get her on a slide under the microscope to really pay attention (weird yeah) Where have those years gone? I must watch more closely this year, before she’s 4 and a whole new child again.

  3. International Elf Service

    Oh your little man sounds completely gorgeous!! We had a birthday yesterday and we have to measure them on the door frame every year and ooh and ah about how much they’ve grown. I definitely agree with your pub decision. It’s the only way. I hope you were up until 1am for good reasons (like packaging cards) and didn’t feel tooooooo tired for it. x

  4. Donna

    Happy Birthday you gorgeous little boy!!! We have to meet up again soon, so I can hear him say duddles as he wasn’t speaking much the last time. It reminds me that T will be 2 in 3 short months!! x

  5. Honest mum

    This made me cry lady. Gorgeous post for your little beaut. Love you went to the pub. I’m having a tough day today with my toddler and this has helped. A lot. After the school run I’m hitting the pub with the kids. Who needs soft play x


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