I have a confession to make, we don’t always buy Clarks shoes for our kids. Do you think badly of me?
I haven’t always been so wicked. When son one started toddling I took him down to Clarks without even considering the alternatives. Did i do it for the fear that all other shoes would damage his tiny precious feet, despite them being about 90% fat? Or was it because I thought other people would look down on me for going against the grain? To be honest It wasn’t even really a decision, you just DO get your kids shoes from Clarks…don’t you?
Well over the last few years I’m afraid I have become disillusioned with Clarks for various reasons: –
- I resent the fact that they often cost more than my own shoes.
- They make them in half sizes and with a half size of growing room. If they have a half size of growing room then i don’t get why you can’t just buy them every other size. I have presented this conundrum to shop assistants before but they just look baffled.
- Another key selling point is the variable width fitting. According to their website less than a third of children fit standard width shoes. Sounds convincing huh? Yep until you go in and they are out of 4G’s but an H should be ok – or they are out of 7.5 F’s them they guess an E would probably cut it.
- Where have the huge foot measuring machines gone? You know the one they used to have when you were a kid, where the metal bits would slide in surrounding your foot making you feel special and scared in equal proportions. On reflection they were pretty comical but at least you would feel like you were getting more bang for your buck.
- The size provided seems to vary by geographical location and day of the week. Who’d of thunk it, but it is even possible to drop a half size instead of grow it!
- They have recently launched ‘a radical new measuring device that combines over 270 years of shoe fitting heritage with state of the art design innovation’ – basically you stand on a thing with an iPad shoved in it. This is a bloody ridiculous abuse of technology – can you do anything without an app these days?! It also goes against one of the key rules in our house which is not to stand on the iPad.
- Where have the rocking horses gone? :(
- I don’t like going anywhere that you have to get a ticket to wait to be served unless it results in the acquisition of nice cheeses. There are no nice cheeses in Clarks.
- I don’t even like their shoes.
So instead i am a bad mum cos i like my kid looking cool in converse (or most of the time £8 pumps from Debenhams) which are actually cheaper and harder wearing!
I will probably be down at Clarks buying school shoes for the eldest when he starts in September though, because that is just what you DO isn’t it? And I’m not sure i could bear the potential wrath at the school gates ;)
**************P.S. My new book The Catastrophic Friendship Fails of Lottie Brooks is out on the 3rd March 2022! It's aimed at 9-12 year olds and you can buy it here :)